Lately there are many things on my mind that I just cant wait to share but there is one that has stood out dominant to the others. Perhaps it is because this subject is something that crosses my mind quite possibly two times a day or more and also because I believe it to be a fairly important message. Now the message I have to share today is not only for women but also the men in those women's lives, so pay attention all.
When you think of motherhood what do you think of? A beautiful round woman holding her belly with a cute rosy glow to her cheeks? Or perhaps a woman pushing her child on a park swing where they go every Wednesday to spend lunch? Or maybe even a soccer mom who drives a minivan that displays that typical, (My child is a future Olympic Gold Metalist, because he is obviously so superior to all of your children at the age of five, and is already an honor student),sticker on the mushed up bumper that ran over the trashcan earlier that morning? Whatever the picture that comes to mind, unless you are a mother I can assure you, you likely have very beautifully skewed picture of motherhood.
Not to scare off those new mom's or to discourage them but motherhood is no easy feat. Sure there's a boatload of wonderful things that happen to a woman when she becomes a mother, from feeling a child kick her from inside the womb to kissing those adorable chubby cheeks but when it come down to it there are some big facts to face. Motherhood is quite possibly one of the biggest self-sacrificing actions and events that takes place for a woman.
Now what do I mean right? Motherhood is amazing, everyone says so! Well yea, duh! Motherhood is amazing and wonderful and having my son was the best thing that has ever happened to me but it sure has been quite a bit more of an experience than I had expected.
First off, most movies have got it all wrong, don't look to them as a reliable source for what your future holds. Getting pregnant and staying incredibly thin while your belly swells larger than an over-filled basketball is not likely. There is little doubt that toward the end of your third trimester you will resemble nothing short of a baby shamu! Stretchmarks are inevitable. Don't ask how the celebrities get past looking like an angry Bengal Tiger came at them and gave their body's an aggressive deep-tissue massage...It boggles my mind. And no one, I mean no one can prepare you for the type of personal invasion happens when you have a baby. I cant count on my hands and toes how many people saw and/or touched my breasts or other awkward parts of my body, eventually I got past the mortification and uncomfortable moments and shamelessly let nurses check me for hemorrhoids. So obviously that's sacrifice number one, your body. Likely it wont ever be exactly as it was before you got pregnant and if it gets very close you are a very lucky woman.
Second sacrifice is sleep. No one can judge you for feeling like a mombie(mom-zombie) 24/7. The truth of the matter is babies don't have a schedule for a long time and then once they do you will still be exhausted. I don't plan on getting any decent sleep again until my son is a teenager, and even then I'm being optimistic. Mom's listen up, consider yourself lucky if you have a man that is a light sleeper because if you have a man that could sleep through a typhoon, I feel for you! If shaking your partner awake while baby is screaming, just so you can get a little help filling a bottle while you change a diaper is near impossible, I feel for you.
For the men. We women appreciate you! If you work so your lady can stay at home with the kiddos, good for you! But hey that doesn't mean you're out of the ballpark bud! While you are at work no doubt having conversations with work buddies and slaving away to make that income, so too is that lovely lady of yours at home. Picture a toddler running around with a fork in his hands and a 5 month old baby with poop up its back, screaming because he's teething and well the obvious(who likes the feeling of poop up their back?) and toys strewn in every direction. The four year old has just taken out every piece of clothing he/she has in the dresser and left a trail from the bedroom to the bathroom where he/she is now playing in the water after going potty and yelling, "i'm done!", so that mom can come and wipe their bum. And because now the toddler is crying because he/she has hurt themselves with the fork no doubt she leaves the four year old to "hurry and wash up" which has now become the disasters of old faithful all over the bathroom. Mom has to make lunch and lay the kiddos down for a nap and just as she gets the four year old to sleep and begins cleaning up the play-yard of a living room baby begins screaming again. A continuous cycle this happens nearly every day. But the beautiful hard working woman she is still puts forth an effort for you, because after all you had a long day at work! So she gets the kids ready for bed, makes dinner and even makes herself look decent after a long day just so you can admire(what was a tear -streaked face and hair that had been sticking out in multiple directions) her beauty.
Even if the scenario is different, every mother understands what I mean when I say, MEN tell your woman she is beautiful. Because she knows you work hard for her, let her know how hard she works for you and always keep in mind the sacrifices of long nights, body changes, weekends in with the kids and every length she goes to for a romantic moment. She deserves to be reminded it's not easy being a mom either and she's doing a great job. Tell her she's ONE HOT MOMMA! And lady's, remember it's ok to scream into a pillow, pull a little hair out and eat a pound of chocolate every now and then. You've given up a lot to be a mommy, keep up the impossible work! ;) You go girl!
Monday, January 20, 2014
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
Paths
It has been over a year since I have written in my blog and in over a year has given me much insight for not only how I write but also how I view life itself. As time has passed I've often wondered if I should revisit and begin anew once again but over and over have found myself reluctant. Today, however; I found my missing desire, my lack of gumption and my discouragement over-ruled by the passion to do the one thing I have most talent in.
This blog has been a big challenge for me. For over the years I have not had a clue of what I should or should not write about. As I went back just moments ago to look at the posts that have been sitting there for over a year I debated on whether or not I should delete them and begin new for the third time..but I hesitated. These past blogs are a part of me that I have chosen to share with those who wish to read them. Just as I can no sooner erase my past I should no sooner erase the words that I felt to be so important then either!
The question was then, "what on earth is my blog going to be about?", and after a few minutes of thought I have decided, it can not be about any ONE thing. Choosing to pick one subject to base my blog around would be as though asking me to choose any one star in the sky to be mine, impossible. So here it is, this blog is dedicated to being all about life. All of the ups and downs and in-between's. I won't make myself blog within a dictated amount of time, no deadlines, no disappointments. Rather I'll use my blog for sharing anything I feel like, whenever I feel like, no rules. So I begin with today's blog sharing what is most on my mind and of up-most importance to me, My Family!
Almost two years ago I thought I would never see the day where I had my own family. My life could be easily compared to that of a tsunami disaster where my friends and family members were left as FEMA and RedCross to help clean up the destruction. My life had been disillusioned. I'd been under the belief that I knew where my life was going and what path I had taken and I was skipping down that path giddily and I kept going on my happy little way in perfect little life until suddenly..I hit the brick wall, face first,no warning. Say whatever you please about pain, but the pain of heart break and betrayal I believe to be the utmost painful.
The truth is, I was young. I was naive. I thought I had given every ounce of love to someone who had given his every ounce back and it turned out that he just hadn't. Everything that I had come to build my life around, the person I'd come build my life around had walked away, the person who had vowed to be strength in weakness. As the lies and secrets and betrayal of the person that I had held so highly upon a pedestal in my mind revealed, so too did the notion that I, Naomi, had not a clue as to the person I was without him. Who was the girl who looked back at me in the mirror?
What kind of music did I like? What was my favorite T.V. show? Did I even like my hair this way? What did I believe in? Where would my life go now? Who was I without that (boy) I'd made the center of my universe?
Standing on my own two feet was most challenging, but when I finally did it was also the most liberating. I realized that I had been doing everything on my own the whole time as it was, there just wasn't another body there for me to lean on in my insecurities.
What does any of this ^ have to do with me having a family? Good question!
I thought that because I had given everything my all at so young that I was a wasted case. No one would want me now after having been a wife and failed(so I thought at the time). And let me tell you, dating can be fun and..it can be a big difficult mess too. I had some good ones and some bad ones and I'm willing to admit that in many ways I was not ready to get back in the dating world although I already had. I learned a lot of things from different people but what I learned most I learned from the man I KNOW I will love for the rest of my life.
Seth Wood.
Not to discredit my family and friends who undoubtedly helped me get out of bed in the morning and stay in school and held me when I cried hysterically, because without them I also would not be where I am today.
Seth and I had talked little before my divorce, due to shyness I suppose and perhaps for both of us but there had always been something about him that seemed to scream (Trustworthy) and (Understanding). If he had not become my friend during this time I don't know what I would have done. In all my life there has never been someone who understands me more than I understand myself and who has just listened without heeding advice. His honesty was refreshing and the things he has taught me have been most helpful. I loved him as a friend and fell in love with him soon after and continue to fall in love with him anew each day that we have together. My relationship with Seth has been a true testimony of what love between two people is and what the past, (that I had so much invested in) should have been. We are by no means a perfect couple but I believe we have perfect moments and I relish those moments as well as the bad because I know they make us stronger.
Seth made me see myself for who I was during that disastrous time. Rather than focusing on who I should be or what I didn't know to be he made me see who I WAS and that despite baggage and a broken heart that I was a beautiful and STRONG woman that was standing on her own two feet.
Since then we've had our laughs and our fights. I have had trials and he's had trials but we always end up back in each others arms. And since then we've began a family that for a while I believed I'd never have. Every day I wake up thankful for these two boys in the picture below. How they make me giggle and test my patients and love me unconditionally.
The struggle of overcoming what five years with that (boy) did to me still endures, but I WILL conquer my fears, trials and tribulations. I WILL overcome the pain and anger completely one day. Undoubtedly I am blessed and I often forget how blessed I truly am and sometimes I take for granted the things and the life that I have but I AM very grateful. I have overcome so much and undoubtedly have much more to defeat. But as I have learned everyone is human. We only have one life. And life is about living not wondering in fear.
I write this particular blog today for young women like myself. Sometimes we fall so deeply into the idea of something that we forget to take a step back and look at the reality of it first. Ad as a reminder that there are many paths in Life but that no matter which one you choose to take you will undoubtedly be lead where you are meant to be. Everything takes time you just have to be willing to give it time.
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Until I write again ;0) ~Naomi
This blog has been a big challenge for me. For over the years I have not had a clue of what I should or should not write about. As I went back just moments ago to look at the posts that have been sitting there for over a year I debated on whether or not I should delete them and begin new for the third time..but I hesitated. These past blogs are a part of me that I have chosen to share with those who wish to read them. Just as I can no sooner erase my past I should no sooner erase the words that I felt to be so important then either!
The question was then, "what on earth is my blog going to be about?", and after a few minutes of thought I have decided, it can not be about any ONE thing. Choosing to pick one subject to base my blog around would be as though asking me to choose any one star in the sky to be mine, impossible. So here it is, this blog is dedicated to being all about life. All of the ups and downs and in-between's. I won't make myself blog within a dictated amount of time, no deadlines, no disappointments. Rather I'll use my blog for sharing anything I feel like, whenever I feel like, no rules. So I begin with today's blog sharing what is most on my mind and of up-most importance to me, My Family!
Almost two years ago I thought I would never see the day where I had my own family. My life could be easily compared to that of a tsunami disaster where my friends and family members were left as FEMA and RedCross to help clean up the destruction. My life had been disillusioned. I'd been under the belief that I knew where my life was going and what path I had taken and I was skipping down that path giddily and I kept going on my happy little way in perfect little life until suddenly..I hit the brick wall, face first,no warning. Say whatever you please about pain, but the pain of heart break and betrayal I believe to be the utmost painful.
The truth is, I was young. I was naive. I thought I had given every ounce of love to someone who had given his every ounce back and it turned out that he just hadn't. Everything that I had come to build my life around, the person I'd come build my life around had walked away, the person who had vowed to be strength in weakness. As the lies and secrets and betrayal of the person that I had held so highly upon a pedestal in my mind revealed, so too did the notion that I, Naomi, had not a clue as to the person I was without him. Who was the girl who looked back at me in the mirror?
What kind of music did I like? What was my favorite T.V. show? Did I even like my hair this way? What did I believe in? Where would my life go now? Who was I without that (boy) I'd made the center of my universe?
Standing on my own two feet was most challenging, but when I finally did it was also the most liberating. I realized that I had been doing everything on my own the whole time as it was, there just wasn't another body there for me to lean on in my insecurities.
What does any of this ^ have to do with me having a family? Good question!
I thought that because I had given everything my all at so young that I was a wasted case. No one would want me now after having been a wife and failed(so I thought at the time). And let me tell you, dating can be fun and..it can be a big difficult mess too. I had some good ones and some bad ones and I'm willing to admit that in many ways I was not ready to get back in the dating world although I already had. I learned a lot of things from different people but what I learned most I learned from the man I KNOW I will love for the rest of my life.
Seth Wood.
Not to discredit my family and friends who undoubtedly helped me get out of bed in the morning and stay in school and held me when I cried hysterically, because without them I also would not be where I am today.
Seth and I had talked little before my divorce, due to shyness I suppose and perhaps for both of us but there had always been something about him that seemed to scream (Trustworthy) and (Understanding). If he had not become my friend during this time I don't know what I would have done. In all my life there has never been someone who understands me more than I understand myself and who has just listened without heeding advice. His honesty was refreshing and the things he has taught me have been most helpful. I loved him as a friend and fell in love with him soon after and continue to fall in love with him anew each day that we have together. My relationship with Seth has been a true testimony of what love between two people is and what the past, (that I had so much invested in) should have been. We are by no means a perfect couple but I believe we have perfect moments and I relish those moments as well as the bad because I know they make us stronger.
Seth made me see myself for who I was during that disastrous time. Rather than focusing on who I should be or what I didn't know to be he made me see who I WAS and that despite baggage and a broken heart that I was a beautiful and STRONG woman that was standing on her own two feet.
Since then we've had our laughs and our fights. I have had trials and he's had trials but we always end up back in each others arms. And since then we've began a family that for a while I believed I'd never have. Every day I wake up thankful for these two boys in the picture below. How they make me giggle and test my patients and love me unconditionally.
The struggle of overcoming what five years with that (boy) did to me still endures, but I WILL conquer my fears, trials and tribulations. I WILL overcome the pain and anger completely one day. Undoubtedly I am blessed and I often forget how blessed I truly am and sometimes I take for granted the things and the life that I have but I AM very grateful. I have overcome so much and undoubtedly have much more to defeat. But as I have learned everyone is human. We only have one life. And life is about living not wondering in fear.
I write this particular blog today for young women like myself. Sometimes we fall so deeply into the idea of something that we forget to take a step back and look at the reality of it first. Ad as a reminder that there are many paths in Life but that no matter which one you choose to take you will undoubtedly be lead where you are meant to be. Everything takes time you just have to be willing to give it time.
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